At Least They're Committed

Uh-oh! Watch out! Requisite parental bitch-fit to rapidly ensue: Don’t you touch them. That’s all. You don’t get to. For as pissed as I get with my husband for his weight gain and lack of ambition, you’d best be happy that he outweighs me by 100+ pounds after you nearly run over him AND my 13-year-old Read more

I don’t know why I always think of this SNL skit when I see Tom Brady except, of course, there’s a lot of truth to it. The moral of the story is that to avoid sexual harassment claims, one needs to: Be Handsome Be Attractive Don’t be unattractive But with the Patriots’ bizarre loss to the Cleveland Read more

Hauling my black rolling suitcase down the hotel hallway at 5 a.m., I pass the doors behind which my colleagues sleep. Singing Journey’s Lovin’, Touchin’, Squeezin’ quietly to myself I tear off the badge and toss it away. I am done.  The stench of spicy breakfast burritos at the airport further sickens me, the rancid complement Read more

Was reading down a couple posts ago and thought I ought to add that I understand myself now and I’m no longer losing it, thank you very much. Totally detailed my segue into sanity in a blog post, but figured I ought to keep it private. Pity. It’s delightfully creative! Read more

It really doesn’t matter whether tea is bad for plants because my pitcher is half full and I need to dump it somewhere. If the leaves wither, well, I might feel the slightest bit sorry, but I won’t cry because they’re not really mine. They were abandon and I’ve simply watered them. Read more

It’s a line from my book, the one I actually finished, in case you’re wondering. I periodically put lines I’ve written in my books and stories on here and on Twitter so the two who follow me too closely can Google them in hopes of learning from whence they came so they can better understand me. Heh. Read more