At Least They're Committed

I flinched when your Uncle EBD told me he and Uncle Demon Spawn were going to the midnight movie of “Transformers.” (They don’t even LIKE Transformers, but this one has Markie Mark in it, and he’s cool.) Dez, you and your mom and dad had just taken off (we had fun tonight, sassafras).

Your uncle noticed my body language. “Is that OK?” EBD’s trademark brow furrowed in concern.

“Yeah,” I said weakly. “Please be careful!”

But it’s all right. It’s been a little more than two years — two years and six days, actually — since I dropped your Uncle EBD off at Uncle DS’s apartment so they could see the midnight “Batman” and, as I watched them walk up toward the apartment, I lost my breath and the terror was like a huge weight, twisting in my chest and I gasped but told myself there was no reason for it. Yet it didn’t go away. I laid in bed that night in my room staring out the bedroom window, waiting for the flashing red and blue lights to reflect off the ceiling. Knowing there was something wrong.

Funny thing was, I DID hear the sirens that night, lots of them, and I sat upright thinking, “Oh, God! No!” and looked at the clock. Almost 1 a.m. Phew, I thought, “They’re safely in the movie theater.” I believe that’s true irony. And not “That’s dark funny ‘haha.’”

Uncle EBD spent that night with Uncle DS, but when I awakened and checked the news clips, I was stunned. no, No, NO, NOOOOOOOOOOO! Your poor Uncle DS was awakened by his sobbing mother, “I know you weren’t in Aurora, (trying to catch breath and talk) you wouldn’t be, right?” He hadn’t heard, “No . . . we’re OK,” he said, adding, “I wondered why all the cops went through the theater. They were standing there when we left. They came in with flashlights . . .”

So tonight when I heard the sirens, on top of all the difficulties that are going on, I quickly texted your uncles. They are safe. Even though I’d shrunk at the thought of them going to the midnight movie, I didn’t have the same feeling, none of the  terror that I had two years ago.

Life is hard. I looked through the furniture, home accent catalog tonight.  Getting fun decorating ideas! Yes, yes. This will be fun. Oh, gotta go, Jim just got here.