At Least They're Committed

I had an amazing day yesterday — first a long lunch with Kenn then happy hour(s) with Caitlin and Danielle — and I was in an exceptional mood this morning on my way to work.

And then I wasn’t.

The heights I’d reached heading to the office were surpassed by the low I hit — all in less time than it would have taken to physically fall. Rock bottom. And the rocks are sharp. I want to die. And there is no reason for it.

Allison came in and we chatted — she’d had a rough morning, too — and she gives wonderful hugs. I called Ellen and she was at the beach and told me to just keep thinking of my upcoming trip. So I’m trying, I’m trying, I’m trying.

Had this ever happened to me before? I was thinking it hadn’t, but then as I was talking to Ellen, I realized it had: The morning after New Media Expo. I had so much fun the night before with the RV team that I was euphoric. And when it was over, it was over, and I know I’ve referred to it before, but I was like the little child being dragged from Disneyland.

I survived that. I guess I’ll survive this. I’m trying to write something legit, and everything I type is for shit. Therefore, I’m going to do what I can and otherwise allow myself to be worthless. I crashed, but I won’t burn. I’ll slowly crawl out of this canyon and be back on solid ground, I will.