At Least They're Committed

Jeremy said he hadn’t noticed after I apologized this morning for yesterday’s erratic behavior. Now, if neither Scott nor Bernie nor Kristen noticed, I shall be duly amazed. I quite recall, through the tunnel of semi-comprehension, Scott and Kristen at least staring at me with furrowed brows, their heads cocked to the right . . . or maybe that was a hallucination.

So, there I was sitting yesterday morning in the calendar meeting, white as a sheet, focusing, focusing, focusing on staying conscious, praying I wouldn’t need to talk, but I’m THE manager of the calendar and a lot of this stuff was up to me so I was of course eventually called on to speak.

My voice, broken and jittery, like my brain, belched out some semblance of sane rhetoric, but speaking caused me to let go of my focus and I started to slip away. I felt my face contort and bit my lip trying not to go stiff and slide out of my chair, twitching, eyes rolled back, mouth agape . . .

Drawing circles on my notebook; focus restored.

I do recall later calling out: “This comes at a good time for me. This week works well!” to Jeremy as some other poor guy was talking about something entirely different. As if the previous conversation had finally computed . . . which it had. Gawd, it’s a good thing most these guys know me.

But the important thing is that I didn’t, didn’t, didn’t faint even if I did look like an ass . . . at least in my clouded mind.

Note to self: Next time your blood pressure bottoms out and you feel light headed and think coffee might be the perfect solution, you’ve got another think coming (YES THAT IS THE CORRECT WAY TO SAY IT). It simply makes you light headed and jittery.