At Least They're Committed

I was excited that D got to get together with a couple of gal friends from high school with DSII and me coming along, but really I couldn’t watch the lacrosse game so well because I have no contacts until Thursday and I felt really out of place and so I started texting friends and I shoulda texted Caitlin cuz she always texts back but nobody texted back (until after I was in bed) and so I just sat there and squirmed and DSII was a total brat to me and it made me wish that I HAD died when I had him and I know I have therapy on Wednesday and I am looking forward to my hair cut on Thursday so I guess that’s what I need to focus on but I feel like I’m really messed up again and that I’ve been going out of my way for people who don’t seem to appreciate it even though they’ve asked me to help and so I unleashed Leah last night but I’ve put her back away now because she is SUCH a necessary evil that it sometimes seems unnecessary and I’m thinking now it’s better for me to just drop off the grid.