At Least They're Committed

We’ve launched this lovely volunteering campaign at my place of employment and because I am a “blue” or a “caregiver” or a “burden bearer” or a strange series of letters (depending upon what personality test you’ve taken as part of your team-building activities) I of course volunteered to organize it and it’s going to be a delightful afternoon at the local food bank working in assembly line fashion to package and prepare food for distribution to the needy! (I do so adore that I can write run-on, grammatically incorrect sentences in my blog.)

“Bless you!!!” I call out. Caitlin just sneezed. She’s the other “blue” or “caregiver” or . . . in our office. Did you see Dogma?

Anyway, so where was I? Ah, yes, yes. And how wonderful is it that the administrators are coming, too? I think that’s AWESOME!!! Even though it means I won’t be able to cuss, I suppose.  

Unfortunately, evidently I again forgot to invite Karen in our office. Bad, bad girl! I am ALWAYS doing that because her office is tucked away in a corner and she’s kind of quiet and then whenever she hears about the activity she stoically walks into my office and says, “What’s this about the volunteering activity?” or “What’s this about (fill in the blank)’s birthday lunch?” And then I have guilt. She has just informed me that she’s no longer speaking to me after the latest oversight; thus I shall dutifully go home and flog myself! (No, silly, I’m a girl, I don’t flog that and I probably wouldn’t even if I had one! Think cat-o-nine-tails and Catholic monks. Sheesh!)

Presently I’m flipping my hair around and looking at my reflection in the glass as the sun sets to the west of me. Good hair day! I believe I shall miss it. Eh, it grows. Be nice to finally complete this little five-year volunteer committment! Oh, but wait, what was it the one guy said? “Girls should have long hair!” Or did he say “women?” Did this give me the slightest pause? I think not! That would be like me saying, “Men should have big dicks!” . . . what? Oh, they can’t help that? Reeeeally? OK, nm.

So where was I? Oh, yes, and I had to e-mail my therapist because I realized after scheduling an afternoon meeting with him on the 13th that I’d already scheduled this little affair and — well, OK, I didn’t HAVE to e-mail him and tell him that I’d changed my session, I just didn’t trust that the scheduling assistant took it off his calendar and I didn’t want him to perceive me as unreliable. And he e-mailed back and said thanks for making him laugh and that made me feel good and . . . . where was I going with this one? Dunno. Hmmmmm . . . That’s OK, I’m allowed. I’m blonde!

Regardless, I need to remember the most important aspect of tomorrow, which is to always keep my chin up — not as in be cheerful, feh, rather because there are going to be photos AND video and, well, when I get in the wrong position or the wrong lighting, I just don’t look as attractive as I’d like to. Looking good! Yes, yes, yes! That truly is what matters most!  Well, that and happy hour after we’re done, of course!